Weekly Headlines

Obstruction of Just-Ass? Did This Giant Potted Plant Purposely Cover Kim K’s Butt in This Paparazzi Pic?
Cool! Registering as a Sex Offender in These 6 States Automatically Enrolls You to Run in a Special Election
Make a Wish Foundation Now Extending its Program to “Americans Likely to Be Killed Soon By Their Own President
We Talked to the Guy Who Started the New Year’s Eve “See You Next Year” Joke and Let’s Just Say The Situation Has Been Properly Dealt With and You Won’t Be Hearing From Him Again
OPINION: Men are Bad as Boyfriends but Great as Coffee Tables
People Speak Up About Imminent Government Shutdown: “We Don’t Know What That Means”
8 Fidget Spinners to Shove Up Your Ass Anytime You feel Tempted to Expose Yourself in the Office
These Brave Coworkers Save their Lunch for 4:50pm Every Day Because It’s the Only Thing That Keeps Them Going
Modern Art Paintings that Make You Say “I Could Have Done That (But Never Did Because I’m Creatively Stunted, Hate Myself, and Mom Never Put my Artwork on the Fridge)”
FOOD SPOTLIGHT: Magic Fruit, But Makes YOU Less Bitter About Your Best Friend’s Success

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